Mrs. Amy, you son did not get on the bus to take him back to day care?

Well where the fuck is he?  Acutally I said - What?

I think he went on the school bus that will take him to your house.

BUT NOBODY IS HOME!

We are working with the school to find him and I'll call you right back.

Ok.


Yep, that's what yesterday afternoon was like.  I sat frozen in my chair staring at the phone wondering if my little man was ok, where he was, and whose ass I was going to kick up and down the fucking road because his little name tag clearly said DAYCARE VAN not school bus #.  I was in shock, ready to burst into tears, and felt so incredibly guilty for being at work - 5 years of arguments to be a stay at home vs. working mom careened past me in a blink of an eye. 

They did call right back and say that he was on the bus but had refused to get off because he didn't see a parent waiting for him. Whoopee I did somethings right, before school started we had a talk about getting on and off buses for school and not to get off unless you saw your day care teacher or a parent.  I however, had not had the talk about - don't get on the yellow bus, you have to get on your school van talk because the teachers told us how they usher the kids to the right spot.  Oh the guilt and shame and anger. I couldn't even call the school to complain, I was just too scared at what would come flying out of my mouth.  It is the second day of Kindgergarten afterall, and they have to put up with my mothering ass for another 6 years, no sense in going off the handle on day 2.  Instead I called hubby and told him to get over there pronto and figure this shit out.  Finally my husbands non-confrontational style pays off - I'm sure the Principal (who greated him) was expecting a screaming parent and was taken aback by hubby's ok, just trying to undertstand doh doh-doh style.

Hubby calls, he's fine, the bus brought him back to the school and the day care waited for him and took him to afterschool care.  The school said that they didn't have anything authorizing them to send him on the day care van. 

OH reallllllyyyyyyyy

How about the forms I FUCKING FILLED OUT AND TURNED IN THAT CLEARLY STATE MY AUTHORIZATION.  I had that moment at work where I realized all my colleagues we're going to see the Home Version of Amy.  The one who can embarass a sailor with her profanity, the one who will beat you down with her anger and arguments, the one who wil get really really loud making her point.  I heard hubby's silence which is his way of trying to avoid poring gasoline on my fire and took a deep breath.  He's ok right?  Yep, fine.  Was he crying?  Nope, just seemed a little scared.

Ok, well I'm banking this one.  They definately lost my child and I have every right to fucking freak out, but I'm saving it. Earn a couple of extra credit points for being the understanding parent and not the one who gets crazy parent mark in the kids file the 2nd day of school. Hubby told me that the day care center director was bitching them out when he got there - let her come off as the bitch, and bonus points to her for being outraged.  I certainly won't forget, but I'll hold onto this for right now.  It's good the school thinks we're pretty OK parents, they have NO IDEA how much shit I will bring to their lives if anything like this ever happens again.  I can only choke down a fuck up as big as this once, next time I will crack a 45 ton can of whoopass on their heads.

Still pissed on day 2 and will probably call the daycare to make sure he got there ok.  Still not sure if I handled it right or if I should have made the what the fuck call yesterday.  Most importantly, trying to not conjure images of my little man wandering the neighborhood scared because he got off the bus and nobodys home, or that awful ride back the school where he's sitting on the big yellow bus alone, wondering why the driver won't take him to daycare because that's where he knows he's supposed to be.

Fucking 'eh