So poor hubby is wandering around the house like a lost hurt puppy because his poor little winkie has not seen any action in weeks.  I don't say hello in passing, I don't offer to shake hands, I don't even proffer a kiss.  He's a desperate man and frankly, a little dangerous.  Last night I'm bent over the dishwasher pulling up silverware and the next think you know I'm almost knocked into the lower tray with him pressing up against me.  Geez, just a glimpse of my large ass and he goes berserk.

 

I do feel sorry for him, he's a man with needs, never has a moment where he's not in the mood and he know I would very likely barf on him if we did more than just a peck on the lips.  First, I am so not in the mood, i mean beyond not in the mood, it doesn't' even enter my mind.  Yeah, I had one good sex dream but that was it, and by the time anything could have happened, I so didn't care anymore.  I am too inwardly focused.  I think about my boobs filling with milk not as objects of affection.  I feel my uterus stretching and growing and don't, for a hot second, think about the big O.  He fundamentally can't understand this, and when I say, I just don't care it's like kicking a dog. Add to that my constant nausea and the idea of rocking back and forth makes me gag and I get distracted because I'm too busy suppressing my urge to barf to think oh yeah baby, do me like that.

 

Poor hubby, I do feel sorry for him, if he wouldn't get mortally offended, I'd offer to get him a hooker or at least watch a porn with him, but I think he'd just be pissed that I'm opting out of the fun.  I know on one hand he understands and realizes this has nothing to do with him - I reminded him of the twelve week draught he's experienced with the last two kids, but it didn't really help him feel all that much better.  I figure at least I'm open with him about it, it's not like it's some big mystery, I say, straight up - honey, I  know you're desperate to get laid, but its just not going to happen with me.  If you want to go upstairs for a while, i'll keep an eye on the kids and you can get some 'release' to your frustrations.  Of course I can't get to the end without laughing but it is meant in all sincerity.  I even said - use you're left hand, he'll think it's a stranger.  yeah, that didn't go over so well.  Thankfully he's got enough sense not to give me the you owe me speech - during my first pregnancy he tried that and it took a week for his balls to drop back down because my reaction was, well, impressive.

 

As we got into bed last night, I hugged him and snuggled for a while, told him how much I loved him and to hang in there it would only be a few more weeks and I'd be back on my game.  He laughed and said, ok, I understand.  I just want you to know that it's a little fucked up that my son is getting more action than me these. days. Sad but true.